Less ogling and more opening

Do not pedestalize beautiful girls.

Last night I was sitting in a busy bar with some friends. My buddies were ogling all the girls that were milling about. They were saying crude things about the girls body parts and even speculating on the levels of sexual athleticism that the girls may have! Needless to say they were not chatting to or communicating with any of these girls, (apart from the awful sub-communication that must radiate from a group of men trying to hide their ogling).

I was keeping quiet because I realize that ogling is very low value. Talk about putting a girl on a pedestal! It’s crucially important to realize that beautiful girls are just like you. Ogling reinforces the idea in a mans head that beautiful babes are unattainable. This is bad.

Some people would argue that barely concealed ogling and commenting is degrading to women. Perhaps, but I think it’s more degrading to the ogling men. By doing this a man is massively elevating the girls value by comparison to his own. By admiring her physical features from afar, making comments to the other lads, but not communicating with her he is putting her on a pedestal. It implies that he and his boys are a pack of lower value creatures that are somehow inferior to the hotties.

This sort of behavior will eat away at your self-esteem if allowed to continue. You are objectifying women and making them into objects to admire secretly and from afar. You are failing to see them for what they really are; normal people who have worries, insecurities, do smelly farts and want to be hit on by cool, charismatic guys.

You will have so much more success with girls if you can bridge the gap between them and you. Stop thinking of them as beautiful and terrifying aliens. You and they are all the same. There’s nothing to be afraid of.

It’s OK and perfectly natural to appreciate a girls beauty but be sure not to pedestalize her. Remembering and constantly re-realizing that gorgeous girls are as human as you and me is good for your game.

You internalize this new idea by talking to pretty girls at every opportunity. When you see a girl you are attracted to go up and talk to her. You will soon realize that most beautiful girls are down-to-earth, friendly and even shy.

So, in short, less ogling and more opening.

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2 thoughts on “Less ogling and more opening

  1. Thanks for the nice article. I do especially agree with you regarding the last sentence – ” You will soon realize that most beautiful girls are down-to-earth, friendly and even shy.” cheers, Alex

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